During this pandemic, city parks have provided much needed relief from enforced isolation.  Every shelter is occupied on holidays and weekends, and the roads are heavy with traffic slowly navigating around joggers and walkers.  Also, we’re suddenly seeing more caregivers of disabled children or aging parents.  Did you know that approximately 43.5 million caregivers have provided unpaid care to an adult or child in the last 12 months? Unless you are a caregiver, you may not realize what a difficult task these people are performing.  Unpaid caregivers are unsung heroes.

There are varying degrees of caregiving, but all of them require patience and empathy.  Aging parents may require just a bit of help with shopping and household tasks.  But a sick or disabled child or spouse often requires full time commitment.  Lately, at the park,  I’ve seen many more children in wheelchairs  with missing limbs or other handicaps. .  My heart goes out to the parents who so lovingly devote their lives to the care of their children.   Where do caregivers get their strength?  I guess it’s the power of love.

Caregiving can be a lonely business, leading to caregiver burnout.   Often, it falls on one person in a family.  Other relatives and friends go about their lives without much regard for the day to day efforts required to take care of a disabled or handicapped person.  When you’re the only one who can shop, cook, clean and run errands while taking care of a person’s needs, you often feel worn out and forgotten.  What’s worse is seeing a loved one through episodes of pain or suffering with no one around to  comfort them but you.

Unfortunately, caregiving is  highly stressful and hazardous to the health. Thirty percent of caregivers die before the people they care for do. A 2003 study of caregivers by a research team at Ohio State University discovered a significant deterioration in the health of caregivers when compared to a similar group of non-caregivers. Even more disturbing is the fact that caregivers had a 63 percent higher death rate than the control group. Before the end of the 6-year study, 70 percent of the caregivers died and had to be replaced.

What can we do to help  caregivers?  If they’re strangers we encounter in public places, perhaps all we  can do is open a door, or give a smile of encouragement.  It get’s a little more complicated if they are family or friends.  The last thing a caregiver wants  is advice or  implied criticism.  What they really need is  your emotional support and appreciation.  A phone call or visit means a lot. Just let them know they’re not alone in all of this.

Unpaid caregivers are unsung heroes.