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DEMI UPSTAGES BRUCE WILLIS’ WIFE

Of all the wacky things I’ve seen coming out of this pandemic, it’s the photo  of Bruce Willis quarantining with ex-wife Demi  Moore and their kids. His daughter, Rumor, said that his current wife,  Emma  Hemming, is “just fine” with it. Really?  She’s all by herself with their two little girls,  while he’s partying with his ex and grown kids. On top of that, they brag about it , posting Instagram pictures of themselves in matching pajamas. Demi Moore has definitely upstaged Bruce Willis’ current wife.

Bruce Willis self isolates with ex wife Demi
How would you like it if your husband quarantined with his ex-wife? Demi upstages Bruce Willis’ wife on instagram.

I can see where Bruce might have gotten stranded  in his vacation home during the  coronavirus pandemic.  And one of his little kids had to go to the doctor, so his current wife had to do what mom’s do—stay home in LA and take care of the children..  Maybe they started out thinking it would only be a couple of weeks before they could be back together.   But two months?  If I’m the current wife, I’d be saying.  “Look, Bruce. You can either buy or rent a trailer, come get me, and help me quarantine with our little girls.”   But maybe, she didn’t really care.  If not, why?

The first thing that strikes you about Emma  is how much she looks like a younger version of Demi.  If it were me, that would make me kind of leery. .  Who wants to be a substitute/fill in for Wife #1.  Especially if he’d rather quarantine with her than me during the covid-19 outbreak. . On the other hand, Emma  might be glad to be rid of the guy.  Like:  Ok Demi, I don’t want to be stuck with Bruce 24/7, so could you take care of him for me?

At any rate, I’m sure she wasn’t expecting to see Demi maneuvering Bruce Willis into a photo shoot..  I mean, if there’s going to be a picture of my husband on the internet, it had better be with me and our kids—not Demi and their kids.  Anyway, everyone finally  got back together around May 4. Publicly, Emma seems to be a good sport about the whole thing.  But is she inwardly seething?  I think most women would be. But that’s Hollywood for you.

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DO YOU PLAN STAY-AT-HOME DAYS?

Do you plan your Stay-At-Home Days?  For the first three decades of my life, everything was planned for me. From the age of five through 21, I was a student. I didn’t have to make any decisions as to how I spent my time.  Go to class, study, recreation, sleep.  The pattern repeated itself every day, for years. 

After college, the routine changed, but my days followed a pattern.  Work, recreation, sleep.  Next came  marriage and children:  Filling my daytime hours wasn’t a problem:  Cook, clean, take care of children, recreation, sleep.  That all changed when my lst husband had a meltdown, and I went to work. Managing  a hospital department while raising three children under ten required a whole lot of planning.  For the next twenty some years,  I made to do lists every single day.  After retiring, I was involved in activities and responsibilities that still required plans and lists.

And then,  the coronavirus hit,  No activities to participate in, or people to see.  The doldrums set in.  I felt tired and aimless.  After a few days, it dawned on me.  This wasn’t going to end soon.  I had to make some plans.

The pandemic requires everyone to self isolate. Do you plan your Stay At home Days
The coronavirus pandemic has changed the way we live our lives.

My days needed structure.  I couldn’t just lie around and wait for the pandemic to end.  Although   I couldn’t attend my tai chi classes or go swimming now, I still needed exercise.  How would I keep  my mind sharp.?  Visiting with family or friends was out.   Nor could I take any trips—not even to Indy.  What in the world would I do?

First, I would not stay in bed until noon.  We had always gotten out of bed around 8:30 to have coffee and read the paper.  That would continue.  But no lolling around in pajamas all day.   Getting dressed, fixing my hair, and a little lipstick made me feel normal, and more energetic.

Do You Plan Your Stay At Home Day? Try doing jigsaw puzzles.
Plan Your Stay At Home Days with jigsaw puzzles to help your brain.

Things to incorporate into my new life:  Reading more books, via kindle.  Spring Cleaning with a vengeance.  Not just washing some windows, but curtains, walls, cabinets.  Cleaning out closets and drawers.  Exercise.   On  rainy days, when I can’t walk outside, I  get my exercise with the dreaded spring cleaning.  You can burn a bunch of calories that way. Since restaurants are closed, it was time for me to experiment with new recipes.   I could play bridge and online. It’s not as much fun as playing with real live people, but it gives you a little entertainment.  My husband ordered some jigsaw puzzles ( Did you know they challenge your brain?.}   Weeding my garden like it’s never been weeded before.  Planting flowers.    Cleaning out my files and drawers.  Writing checks and paying bills.  Sending birthday cards.

Sample daily schedule:

8:30: Make coffee, read the newspaper (home delivery)

9:00  Do morning stretch exercises

9:15   Light breakfast.  Make bed, turn on computer, check e mail and other online favorite websites.

10:00  Start project for the day:  cleaning, gardening, writing, etc..  One day a week, go to grocery store (wearing mask, gloves, glasses).

12:00  Lunch

12:30  15 minutes of unfiltered sunshine (weather permitting)

12:35  Paperwork:  paying bills, filing, writing cards,

1:30   Put in a load of laundry or write blog.

2:00  Walk in park, weather permitting

3:00  Fold laundry or finish blog.

3: 15 Bridge online,or help husband with jig saw puzzles

4:00  Tai chi (3 short exercises)

4:15  Personal care:  Hair,  nails, etc.

5:00  Start planning dinner

6:00 Dinner

6:30 Watch news

7:00 Clean kitchen

The rest of the evening is pure relaxation:   Meditating, Netflix streaming,  favorite TV shows, or more reading.  A warm bath, then bed around 11:00.

The schedule is subject to change at any time,  to allow  for telephone calls. These are usually spontaneous, and can’t be planned.

And so, after 8 weeks of self-isolation, I’m busier than ever.   Do you plan your stay-at-home days during the Covid 19 crisis?

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TAKE A MOTHER’S DAY BREAK FROM COVID-19

It’s been almost two months since we’ve been in this pandemic.  We’re worn out, and depressed.  But just for today, why not take a Mother’s Day Break from Covid-19.  Give yourself a time out from from your worries , and focus on the good things that are happening. 

Here are 9  things to celebrate today:

Gas prices are low.   I’ve not filled my gas tank since March 15.  And when I do, it’s going to be a pleasant surprise when I see the final bill.

No school shootings.  Since schools are closed, we don’t have to see or hear about kids killing kids.

No new middle eastern conflicts.  Worldwide virus outbreaks have incapacitated most of our enemies.

Reconnecting with families.  Kids and parents are getting to spend more time together.  Getting to know each other. Playing games. Cooking.  Bicycling. Going to parks.

Spring weather. Yes, we had a cold blast.  But the trees are leafing out, there’s greenery everywhere. If you have a garden, you can start putting out annuals.

Kindness of strangers.  When you walk in the park, everyone you encounter smiles and waves.  That didn’t used to happen.  And look at the food banks all over the country.  People reaching out to help families in need.

Take a Mother's Day Break. Be grateful for the kindness of strangers.
TAKE A MOTHER’S DAY BREAK FROM COVID-19. BE GRATEFUL FOR THE KINDNESS OF STRANGERS.

Low credit card bills.  We were shocked to receive our Visa statement this month.  It was less than half what it normally is.  That’s what happens when you don’t go anywhere, eat out, or shop in malls.

Stimulus money and unemployment checks.  Lots of folks actually are enjoying more income than they had when they were working.

Wellness.  99% of Americans do not have Covid-19.  So if you’re healthy and well, celebrate that today.  You’ve done a good job of hand washing, mask wearing, and social distancing.

Things to avoid:

Watching or listening to the news .  Take a break from alarmist news reporters who like to get you worked up and scared about what’s going on in our country.

Negative thoughts.  When something unpleasant enters your mind, don’t dwell on it.  As an example, what if you get the virus?  As long as you’re following CDC guidelines, that’s all you can do.  If you do get sick, it won’t be because you were careless.  Don’t spend today worrying about it.  Take a few deep breaths. Listen to some music. Take a walk.  Call a loved one.

Just for today, take a break from Covid-19.  Happy Mother’s Day!.

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Stop! You don’t need wipes to disinfect

Last night,  the manager of a plant that makes Clorox wipes  was interviewed on nightly news. He said demand has tripled. Consequently, they’re working overtime (and making big bucks). to fill up empty store shelves.   Everyone is beginning to panic.  Stop! You don’t need wipes to disinfect.

If you can't get Clorox wipes, you can make your own solution. Stop! You don't need disinfectant wipes.
Stop! You don’t need disinfectant wipes. You can make your own bleach solution during this pandemic.

You can’t even buy Clorox wipes on Amazon.  They’re out of stock.  It boggles the mind, when you know how easy it is to disinfect with plain old bleach.  I haven’t seen any store out of it.   I always have a big bottle of it in my broom closet.  It’s dirt cheap. All you have to do is pour a little bit of bleach into some water, put on some rubber gloves, take an old rag, and voila!  You have a disinfectant every bit as good as clorox wipes.  You not only saved money, but you helped the environment.

Can you believe there was a time when people didn’t use wipes to clean a baby’s bottom, wash their face, or disinfect?  In the early sixties, I used soap and water on a washcloth.  I had never heard of a baby wipe.  It wasn’t until the seventies that they became popular.  It wasn’t long before there were wipes for just about everything.  And people thought they couldn’t do without them.

What’s bad about wipes?  For starters, they’re bad for the environment. Whether baby wipes or disinfecting wipes, they pose a major problem by clogging up sewer systems.  Once they enter the sewer system, wet wipes bunch together and trap food and other waste to form wads called “fatbergs” made of fat from food waste and wipes.

Most wipes contain plastic fibers that are not biodegradable. When the wipes make their way into the ocean, they get ingested by sea creatures, such as turtles, who mistake them for jellyfish.  The plastic stays in the stomach of the animal, and eventually, they die of starvation.

Plumbers do not like wipes. Even though some wet wipes are marketed as “flushable” and “septic-safe,”  they take a longer amount of time to do so compared to toilet paper.   Consequently, clogged pipes and blockages occur more frequently.

Save money, save the environment.  First,  clean and remove dirt and grime from surfaces.  Next,  follow the directions on a bottle of bleach to make your own disinfectant solution. But be careful not to use too much.  Fumes from too strong a solution can sting your eyes and nose.

Yes, you can get through this pandemic, even if you can’t buy disinfectant wipes.

 

 

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STAY AT HOME DIARY: WEEK 7

When every day is the same, you lose your sense of time.   Consequently, I almost forgot my youngest grandson’s birthday, May 4. It’s worse at the first of the month, when you don’t even know what month it is.  Luckily, my husband keeps a birthday calendar, and reminded me when he flipped it from April to May.

Planted flowers for the big container on our deck.  I just couldn’t wait, and Meijers had a great selection of annuals. But here’s the bad news.  Spent so much time outside that I inhaled too much tree pollen.  Woke up in the middle of the night with a stuffed up nose.  Trouble with spring allergies is that they scare you into thinking you’ve caught the coronavirus.   Now, the weatherman is predicting frost for the weekend.  I’ll have to cover the flowers with a sheet overnight.  The rule of thumb used to be: don’t plant annuals until after Mother’s Day.  I think that’s good advice.

Stay At Home Diary: Malls are reopening this week in Indiana
Stay at Home Diary: Week 7. Malls are opening this week in Indiana.

Malls are opening this week, but why?  What’s there to buy when you aren’t going anywhere or seeing anyone.?  Here’s what they’re going to do in places like Macy’s and Stein Mart:  Everyone wears a mask. The bathroom and dressing rooms are closed.  You have to take your clothes home to try them on, and return them if they don’t fit.  Sounds like a lot of bother.  If there’s anything we’ve learned  during the lock down, it’s how few clothes a person really needs.  My closet is full of clothes that haven’t been worn in months.

This is four season weather.  In the side hallway:  wool hat, wool scarf, mittens.. Gardening gloves and winter gloves.  winter coat, winter jacket, spring coat, sweat jacket, raincoat.  And—I’ve worn all of them in one week’s time.  Weather has gone from 82 to 34  degrees in the past 7 days.

We’ve managed to keep our weight even.   In fact, my husband has lost five pounds.  Wish I could say the same.  We’re both at the far end of normal on body mass Index charts.   I can remember when I was borderline underweight.  That’s what retirement will do for you.  But it’s good at our age to have a little “extra,” in case we get sick.  That’s what they say, and I’m going to believe it because I want to.

More Netflix binging. This week started watching “Hollywood,” which is supposed to be the story of Rock Hudson.  The actor they’ve chosen to portray Rock is no way as handsome as he was. I think they could have done a better job of casting that part.

Today, our local paper ,has gone from 7 days a week to 5 days.   We still get the Indy Star every day, but on the Tuesdays and Sundays when we don’t get a local paper,  it isn’t delivered to our door.  I have to get up out of bed , put on a coat , and walk to the end of our driveway. to get the Indianapolis paper.   Well, that’s one way of keeping track of time.

We’ve changed to bar soap for washing our hands.  Ivory for me, Dove for my husband.  Now our hands are not red and itchy from scented, colored liquid soap. .But with all the extra scrubbing,  fingers are swelling, and my wedding ring is too tight.

Grocery shopping one day a week is a big job.  Our side by side refrigerator and freezer are packed to the brim. Wonder what people with big families are doing?  They would have to shop more often for milk, juice, eggs, meat, etc.  So far, haven’t had any problems with shortages except for canned cheese soup, cream of onion.  Plenty of cream of mushroom and plain tomato. available.  Didn’t realize how many people dislike mushrooms.

Never dreamed I would still be writing a Stay At Home Diary after seven weeks of the Covid-19 pandemic.  Stay safe.  Hang in there.

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IS ELLEN DEGENERES QUEEN OF MEAN?

I’ve loved stand up comedians from the first  time I saw Mort Sahl at Mister Kelly’s in Chicago,  in  1958.  Fresh out of Purdue, living in the big city, I was enthralled with his social satire and improvised monologues.   It was the heyday of comics like Jonathan Winters, Dick Gregory, and of course, late night talk show host Johnny Carson.  But funny people aren’t always nice to be around offstage.  Winters was bi polar. Carson was known to be a mean, nasty guy after a few drinks.  Let’s face it, there’s a dark side to comedy.   Psychologists speculate that comedy is born out of an effort to cope with tragedy.  So, is Ellen Degeneres really the Queen of Mean?  Or, is she just like a lot of other talented comedians who carry around a few emotional problems.

Carrie Fisher was known in high school as a “mean girl.”  She was also very funny, with a sharp wit and one liners that kept every one in stitches.  Unfortunately, she was also a drug addict who died of an overdose at the age of 60.  Robin Williams battled anxiety and struggled with alcoholism, and committed suicide by hanging at the age of 63.

According to an Oxford University psychologist, “The creative elements needed to produce humor are strikingly similar to those characterizing the cognitive style of people with psychosis – both schizophrenia and bipolar disorder,”   In other words, it’s thought that there’s some kind of link between creativity and mental instability.

Let’s go back to Ellen.  The first time I saw her act was at the Kennedy Center in Washington D.C., about 20 years ago.   It was a sell out crowd.  Her brand of stand up comedy was unique, because she wasn’t vulgar, didn’t use four letter words.  How could anyone manage to be that funny, and still come across as wholesome and kind?  Somehow she pulled it off. She was younger and cuter then. We didn’t know she had such big ears because she had a fluffy haircut that covered them.  She was a gay woman who came across as very sweet and feminine.  Consequently, everyone loved her.

If you didn’t know better, you would have said she came from a normal,stable family.  But that wasn’t true.  Her folks got divorced when she was a teenager, and she was yanked out of school in New Orleans when her mom remarried.  and moved to Atlanta, Texas.  According to her biography, she was molested by her step dad before moving back to New Orleans.  My stepson was living there then, and hung out with some people she knew.  She was extremely popular.  We all love someone who can make us laugh, don’t we?

most comedy has a dark side
Is Ellen Degeneres  the Queen of Mean? Or did she just have a lot on her mind at the 2014 Oscars?

There’s been a story in the news about Ellen’s former bodyguard at the 2014 Oscars.   He said she was “cold” and “demeaning.”  Wait a minute.  She’s hosting the Oscars, planning a pizza party for the stars.  She’s got a few things on her mind. She paid big bucks to hire this guy.  Why should she lose her concentration by stopping to make conversation with a person whom she doesn’t know, and will never see again?

Ellen may be mean in private, (according to some news reports)   but I’ll take that to comics like Kathy Griffin, who held up a bloody effigy of the USA president.  Other female comedians can’t complete a sentence without a four letter word.   I’m sorry if Ellen doesn’t treat her employees well, because disagreeable people are usually unhappy.  But is Ellen Degeneres truly the Queen of Mean?  I don’t think so.

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FINDING SOLACE NEAR THE RIVER

When something stressful invades my life, I always find myself returning to the solace of  the river.  Living inland, I can’t enjoy the comfort of deep blue water or the sound of crashing ocean waves.  But there are peaceful lakes and rivers all over the world, and they are there for you in times of despair.  

In times of anxiety, find the solace of water by returning to the river
DURING TIMES OF ANXIETY, FIND SOLACE BY RETURNING TO THE RIVER.

My river—the Wabash—isn’t blue like the ocean unless the sun is very bright and the sky is cloudless.  It’s often a cool, pale green.  While watching the gentle,  rippling waves moving up toward  the bend in the river,  I  begin to relax . The Wabash is here for me now, and tomorrow.  It’s steady, predictable and comforting.  And even if I’m not stressed out, it gives me a feeling of calm and clarity that heightens my satisfaction with life in general.

The river front in my city isn’t a particularly popular destination.   A cluster of subsidized senior housing units nearby doesn’t add much glamour.. Consequently,  it isn’t a ritzy, fashionable spot. But the city maintains parks where children can play, and shelters where folks can picnic.

The banks of the Wabash are  lined with towering trees and leafy bushes.  Geese wander in the grass, guarding their fluffy yellow goslings.  Around noontime , you will see  many parked cars with solitary drivers, reading books or cheering themselves up from whatever might be wrong in their lives.  Strangers may nod, but they keep to themselves.    

There’s a movement in the town to do something like the river walk in San Antonio, Texas,  I’m hoping that doesn’t come to pass in my lifetime.  Right now, I like driving past the small childhood home of musician Paul Dresser who wrote, “On the Banks of the Wabash,”   He lived there with  his brother,  Theodore  Dreiser , author of  the scandalous novel , “Sister Carrie.” Then, there’s  that moment of joy when I see the sunlight shining across the water.  And I’m glad I found solace by turning to the river.