Thanksgiving is coming! Soon, everyone will gather at Grandma’s house for dinner. Or, perhaps one of the siblings will do the hosting. There will probably be some kids running around the table, and maybe a baby in diapers. While the parents are showing off their adorable offspring, there may be guests who don’t have any children. Consequently, they might be critical of your parenting skills. Why do you let your kids run wild? Or let the baby scream at the top of her lungs? There are lots of reasons that parents aren’t perfect. But childless relatives shouldn’t judge parents of little kids.
Recently, there was a fire in a neighboring city, where two children perished in a trailer fire. The media said they were home alone. Turned out, they weren’t quite so alone as it sounded. The mom had run to the trailer next door after the kids were asleep. Within minutes, a fire exploded in her trailer, making it impossible to rescue the children. Naturally, everyone began blaming the parents. Especially people who don’t have any children. But then again, some of us weren’t so quick to judge. The Dad was at work on the night shift. Maybe the woman just ran next door to borrow a cup of sugar. Or needed to talk to someone about a problem. Living in a trailer, there’s not a lot of extra money floating around for therapists. And if you were making a birthday cake and needed some sugar, running to the grocery store wasn’t an option.
I don’t know why that mother went to the trailer next door, and I probably never will. All I know is that she had two children under the age of three, and her husband had to work nights. Maybe she worked days. And when you’re raising two kids in a trailer, it’s not quite as easy as if you live in a middle class home with a good furnace and no overdue bills.
Back to Thanksgiving dinner. Why does your sister-in-law let her baby scream? Possibly , she was up all night with the child, and is so exhausted that she doesn’t even hear it. Why does your cousin let her boys run around the living room? Maybe she’s hoping that by dinner they’ll have burned off some of their energy. Or, it doesn’t really bother her, as long as they’re not pulling each other’s hair. A person who’s never raised a child will never quite understand how challenging it is to be a parent. It’s a 24/7 job, with no sick days allowed. According to a recent study, parents were worse off in countries where parents receive fewer subsidies and lack family friendly policies. And the United States was at the top of that list.
If you feel annoyed by little children on Thanksgiving day, take a deep breath and bite your tongue. After all, you’ll soon be walking out the door to enjoy your peace and quiet. But for parents, the beat goes on. Childless people shouldn’t judge those with kids.
Happy Thanksgiving.