BUYERS BEWARE: MELONS ARE A CRAPSHOOT

There’s nothing so rare as a sweet, juicy cantaloupe.  But when you pick up one at the supermarket, you’re making a big gamble.  That’s because at least half the time, they’re bland.  Some are so bad that they taste like squash.  Buyers beware: melons are a crapshoot .

Years ago,  I used to return  a bad cantaloupe to the place where I’d bought it. Not so much for the money, but because I thought store managers shouldn’t get away with ripping me off.  When you see a big display of melons, you assume they’ve been tasted by someone in charge.  And maybe they have.  If so, that’s even worse.  How can a produce manager look their customers in the eye while selling them a bland  cantaloupe or a watery watermelon?

It's disappointing to pay good money for a bland, tasteless melon.
It’s disappointing to pay good money for a bad melon. Buyers beware:  melons are a crap shoot .

Farmers know when they have a batch of bad melons, and they know why. It’s typically due to too much or too little rainfall. When I was a child, we had a true farmer’s market in our city.  Not the dainty little affairs that pass for a farmer’s market nowadays.  Real farmers came to town with bushels of vegetables and fruits.  That’s when people canned at home.  If a farmer wanted to sell you a watermelon,  it was expected he would offer you a “plug” to taste.  Ditto for muskmelons, now called cantaloupes.  You always knew what you were getting when you bought a melon.

Today, buying supermarket melons is a crapshoot..  You lug the thing home, wash it under running water, then hold your breath while you cut into it.  Ahhh. This one is delicious.  You’ve hit the jackpot. Unfortunately, this only happens about half the time.  How many melons have you tossed in the garbage because they’re so tasteless?  You’re tempted to complain or ask for a refund, but it’s way too much trouble.  Your costly  melon is thrown away because it’s inedible.  Is that a rip-off, or not?

All supermarkets are guilty of selling bland, tasteless melon sometimes.  I think it’s wrong.  Buyers beware: melons are a crapshoot.  And if you get a bad one, be sure to complain to the store manager.   Maybe even ask for a refund.

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