Tag: sibling rivalry

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DC AWASH IN FAMILY DYSFUNCTION

Some of us have experienced more family dysfunction than we would care to admit.  The façade of the “perfect family” is one that’s carefully nurtured and preserved.  Politicians, especially, strive to  present such an image.  President  Barack Obama and Vice President Mike Pence represent the ideal  persona of happily married family men.  Unfortunately,  right now, Washington DC politicians are awash in a sea of family dysfunction.

Starting last year with Joe Biden’s son, Hunter. He’s the one who got kicked out of the Navy.  Nevertheless,  he made millions  for doing almost nothing in China and the Ukraine while his dad was VP.  Then, he got some show girl pregnant and refused to assume responsibility for the daughter she bore him.  She had to go to court and get a DNA test to prove paternity. But that’s all water over the dam.  He was proudly scheduled as a speaker at the DNC convention.

Things got really juicy in July when Donald Trump’s angry, disgruntled niece-from-hell,  wrote a tell-all book about the dysfunctional Trump family.   OMG! Senior Trump was a tyrant, an abuser, and  Lord knows what all.  Granny Trump opted out of motherhood—it was just too much for her.  And to top it all off, the oldest son was an alcoholic, and his kids didn’t get any more in the final Trump  will than the other  grandkids.  Well, Mary Trump  got even. She  went so far as to stir up some sibling rivalry, secretly recording big sissy Mary Anne complaining about baby brother.  I guess all of us rant and rave about our sibs at times, but we don’t expect it to be recorded for public consumption.

Back to Biden.  We know he likes to smell women’s hair.  That seems weird, but not exactly immoral.  What we didn’t know, until now, is that he had an affair with his wife , Jill, while she was still married to someone else.  Her ex husband is writing a tell all book to be released in October.

Speaking of affairs with a married person. Vice Presidential candidate,  Kamala Harris was 29 when she started an affair with 60 year old Willie Brown.  His being Speaker of the California State Assembly  made up for the age difference, I guess.  Trouble was, he had a wife and three children.

DC awash in sea of dysfunction. Kellyanne Conway & husband George finally quit their jobs to become parents.
DC Awash in Sea of Family Dysfunction. Kellyanne Conway and her husband finally quit their jobs to become parents.

Next, we  have the, most blatantly dysfunctional family  imaginable with Trump advisor, Kellyanne Conway.  Her husband started  a Super Pack,  called the Lincoln Project, to bash Trump.  I guess they must have been living separately.  We wondered where their four kids fit into all this, but last week, we found out.  Their teenage daughter went online to accuse them both of being losers and abusers as parents. Consequently, both Kellyanne and her husband George quit their jobs and presumably are trying to salvage what’s left of  their dysfunctional family.

Does it really matter to the voters?  Bill Clinton had an affair with Monica Lewinsky and got impeached.   He’s been seen at the secret hideaway of sex offender Epstein, but they still had him speaking at the DNC convention.

Reporters  just love it all.  It gives them something  to rant and rave  about.  But after awhile, you wonder if politicians are a different breed.  You’d have to have a hide like a rhinoceros to survive.  Maybe all that family dysfunction toughened them up.

Remember the words of PT Barnum: “There’s no such thing as bad publicity.”

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DOWNSIDE of being BABY of the FAMILY

If you were not the baby of your family, you probably envied the sibling who was.  You thought they got all the attention, were pampered, and spoiled. As the baby of four siblings, I have to disagree.  Here’s the downside of being Baby of the Family:

My older siblings, consisting of a pair of twins and the eldest—were 4 to 5 years older than I was.  This meant that during family meals, I  sat  in a high chair or booster, listening to them conversing among themselves , while I was merely a silent observer.  Do you think this changed when I was an adult?  Absolutely not.  Even when all of us had spouses, they talked politics and money over my head, while my opinion wasn’t even asked for.  I never complained about this to anyone, because I was so accustomed to that left-out feeling.

In the nineteen forties, most people sent and received volumes of printed Christmas Cards.  I remember when I could first read, and the surprise at  seeing my name included in the names of my parents  children.  Wow, I thought, I really am a part of this family.

While older siblings may think the baby of the family is spoiled, it doesn't always feel that way
THE BABY OF THE FAMILY OFTEN FEELS LEFT OUT

Then, there was the hand-me-down issue.  That was the day of hand knit sweaters.  After years of wear and washing, they were typically matted and shrunk, but they fit, and if I wanted to stay warm in the winter, there was no alternative.  Other hand me downs included faded dresses, and coats with frayed sleeves and mismatched buttons.  Easter and Christmas were the exceptions.  My mother always sewed new outfits for those occasions.  So I really looked forward to going to church on holidays, in my brand new clothes.

Did I consciously resent wearing mostly hand me downs?  Actually, I never thought about it and I don’t recall feel sorry for myself.  After all, money was scarce, and wearable clothes had to be salvaged.  It was only years  later that  I realized hand me downs made me feel less valued than my older siblings.

The baby of the family is usually sheltered from any bad news.  When my Dad lost his job, I wasn’t told about it.  And yet, I sensed there was something wrong.  Other family mishaps were kept from me, even after I had  left home.  Only when the crisis was resolved did they tell me what had happened.  This was meant to be kindly, but it left me feeling useless.  If I couldn’t help my family through trouble, what good was I?

The past ten years have made me realize the saddest thing of all about being the baby of the family.  My parents and siblings have all passed away, and I am the only one left.  Yes, I have my children, but there’s no relationship so close as that between brothers and sisters who share the same DNA.  Right now, I would give anything to go back to that moment in time when I was sitting at  the family dinner table, mutely listening while the conversation swirled around me.