If there’s anything that makes us mad, it’s when someone who treated us bad gets to be happy. It doesn’t matter whether they were right or wrong, or if it’s all in our minds.  We simply don’t think they deserve to be happy, especially if we aren’t. Often, the person  we hate appears to be happier than they really are.  That doesn’t help.  If they give the outward appearance of being happy,  it’s galling.   Misery hates happiness.

The tell- all book about Donald Trump by his niece, Mary Trump, is a case in point.  She and her brother think they were messed over by their aunt and uncles.  It was all about money.  Mary  thought they should have inherited more than the senior Trumps’ other grandchildren.  She and her brother have been nursing a 20 year grudge, and she was sick and tired of seeing Donald Trump happy.  So she decided—in her words—to “take him down.”  She wants him to be as unhappy as she , apparently is.  Although , she’s probably feeling a little bit happier with the royalties from a #1 best selling book.

Another case of misery hating happiness may occur when two people get a divorce.  If one person remarries and is happy, the other one feels resentful if they haven’t moved on successfully.

There are numerous ways that one person’s joy may cause another’s misery.   A woman who can’t get pregnant resents her friend with children. A co-worker gets a promotion that we feel should have been ours.  It goes back to the beginning of recorded history.

What should you do if you realize that your happiness is  making someone miserable?  Obviously, avoid bragging.  But some things can’t be fixed.  You can’t stop being happy .  And if you’re the miserable one, get over it.  As the saying goes, get a life.   Do something different. Go someplace new. Start a gratitude list.  If it’s really that bad, see a therapist.   Or, if the person you hate is the president of the United States, you could write a book about him, and get back some of that money you thought you deserved