The holiday season is a time when birth order can be problematic.  Especially if you’re like me—the baby of the family.  All families have a baby, unless there’s just one child.  So there are zillions of us out there.  When you’re a baby of the family,  it sometimes seems like the older kids receive more thoughtful gifts from Santa.   They are more experienced  at wheedling their parents into getting them what they desire.    There are other downsides to being the baby, but one of the worst is when your  siblings have all passed away and you’re the only one left with the baby of the family blues.

I really didn’t appreciate my place in the family when I was growing up.    After all, I had two older sisters,  which meant most of my clothing was on the third round.  (That was in the post depression years, and my father had health problems.)  It wasn’t until I was old enough to baby sit that I could pay for my own new clothes.   I didn’t hold it against anyone, because I knew money was tight in our family of three girls and a boy—but I didn’t like it much, either.

Later on, I nurtured a few more grudges, like remembering  the time I was  accidentally left behind after a picnic in the park.  They were back in a few minutes, but it felt like everyone sorta forgot about me sometimes.

Another annoying thing was being called by my oldest sister’s first name.   And when I moved back to town at the age of 36, I was shocked to find that people were still doing it.  It  happens to this day, even though my sister is long gone.   My identity, so carefully nurtured, once again was swallowed up by my  sister, who had lived in the same town her entire life.

After college, I moved away.  Took a job in Chicago, later moved to Florida.  Then I started missing my older siblings.  and cried when their visits came to an end. And when my first marriage went bad, and I had three little children to take care of, they opened their arms to me when I moved back home.  That’s when I was glad to be the baby of the family.

I suspect Meghan and Harry have a touch of Baby of the Family Blues.  Meghan, especially.  Not only was she her mother’s only child , she was the half-sister baby in her father’s first family.

The baby may feel like an outsider, because the older kids seem to get more of their parent’s attention and respect.   I can  understand why Harry refers to himself as the Spare.  I remember exactly how that feels.  The baby of the family blues never really go away.