HERE’S TO GOOD DADS ON 4TH OF JULY

Once upon a time,  most families were lucky if they owned one car. Many didn’t.  Therefore,  many people didn’t get to watch the fireworks, because no one owned a television.   If you were lucky, your Dad might drive you out to the stadium to watch the fireworks.  So, here’s  to all the good Dads on the 4th of July who took their kids to see the show.

Moms were mostly stay-at-home, and by evening,  they were washing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen after the day’s picnic of fried chicken (no KFC then) potato salad, deviled eggs and chocolate cake. And no air conditioning.  So it was up to Dad to load the kids in the car to see the fireworks, which were sponsored by the American Legion out  at the stadium

 Across the street lived a widow who didn’t own a car, so we always made a place for her daughter in ours, even though it meant doubling up, and sitting on each other’s laps in the back of the old Chevie . (no seat belts in those days).  We might get to the stadium right before sunset, and wait impatiently for darkness to descend.  And then, wonder of wonders, that first brilliant explosion of fireworks.  Breathlessly , we clapped and cheered as the rockets went off, and one after another colorful displays lit up the sky.

THANKS TO THE GOOD DADS ON THE 4TH OF JULY
Kids always will remember the special times at the fireworks. Here’s to all the good dads on 4th of July.

Dad loved the fireworks, too, but I think what he liked most was watching all the happy, awestruck children, and knowing that he had made this night possible by taking the time to drive us there. When we got back home, way past our normal bedtime, my mother would have taken off her apron and fallen asleep on the couch, waiting to hear about what we’d seen.   We might have another piece of chocolate cake and a glass of milk before we finally went to bed and dreamed of fireworks.

Thanks to my beloved  Daddy, (long gone) ,  for those wonderful memories. Here to all the good dads  who take their  kids to see the fireworks on Independence Day.

 

WHY DO PEOPLE SHOOT FIRECRACKERS?

We’ve been hearing fireworks every night for a couple of weeks in our neighborhood.   I’ve never shot firecrackers from  home, but fireworks like sparklers were another story.  My children loved them, but we were always careful to supervise their use.    Actually, I still  enjoy the sound of firecrackers . They seem  fun and exciting.  Especially during this dull dreary time of the coronavirus pandemic.    But it makes you wonder.  Why do people shoot firecrackers?

Why do people shoot firecrackers? They can be dangerous
Why do people shoot firecrackers? They may appeal to risk takers.

Fireworks are also explosives, and can be dangerous.  According to Kansas State University psychology  professor Mary Cain, this adds to their appeal.  “Engaging in risky behaviors is very reinforcing for people,” she said. “For some, it can cause the  release of a chemical in the brain that makes people feel good.”  She goes on to explain that  such people are “high sensation seekers.”  They love things like roller coasters and sky diving.

I don’t like either one of those activities. Therefore, I  don’t qualify as a risk taker.  But I love the sound of firecrackers, even if they  wake me up at night.  They’re  like a  celebration of  life.  I picture the person behind them as exuberant and cheerful.  I  don’t personally know anyone shooting firecrackers. And I  probably wouldn’t enjoy having them as next door neighbors.  However,  one of the reasons  firecrackers are  appealing is their novelty.  They make the holidays seem more festive.

On the other hand, people have valid reasons for disliking fireworks in the neighborhood.  They may scare small children, or wake babies up from their naps. Some dogs and cats are afraid of fireworks—it can send them into a frenzy.  More importantly, veterans with post traumatic stress disorder may find them traumatic.  The same may be true of retired law enforcement officers.  And what about people with jobs?  They may not be able to get back to sleep if you awaken them in the middle of the night.

Many states ban the use of personal fireworks.  Other states are ambivalent, and attempt to regulate their use.  But one thing is clear.  Whether you love or hate them, firecrackers are here to stay.

Happy 4th of July!

DO YOU LIKE SAVANNAH’S HAIR?

My ambivalence toward perfectly beautiful women started when I was sixteen.  Girls and boys  went  “steady” in those days.   You wore the boy’s class ring on a chain around your neck.  If he was an athlete,  he let you wear his letter sweater to the movies.  And so it was that my first  boyfriend took me to see A Place In The Sun with Elizabeth Taylor. With a sinking heart, I knew I could never be that beautiful.   Everything about her was perfect. Which I could never be.  I’ve often felt that way about national  tv news reporters, including the perfectly groomed  Savannah Guthrie of NBC.  But now, due to the pandemic, she’s let her hair down, so to speak.  Do you like Savannah’s hair? 

Back to Elizabeth Taylor.  Most sixteen year old girls are pretty, just because they’re  young.  And yet, at that age, I didn’t appreciate the advantage of youth. Consequently,  when I looked in the mirror, I saw a freckled nose, frizzy hair, a pale complexion, and a mouth full of braces.  I thought of myself as “skinny,” not thin.   There wasn’t a chance in the world I would ever have the cleavage of Elizabeth Taylor in a strapless evening gown.  While I loved going to the movies, I often left feeling like a frump in comparison to the likes of Audrey Hepburn and Grace Kelley.

Women in television are held to the same high standards.  They must have perfect hair –never gray– and makeup. Smooth complexions.    Long, shapely legs under short skirts. Female TV newscaster  look far more glamorous than their male counterparts.  Popular newsmen can be overweight, bald, pockmarked, have big ears ,wear glasses,, and still land high paying jobs.  Although a few, like David Muir, are obviously picked for their hunkiness, it’s not really necessary for a male  television reporter  to make it to the top because of his good looks.

Covid-19 has changed all that perfection for female reporters.  They’ve had to go it on their own.  Do their own hair and makeup, put up with unflattering lighting. But I like them more now.  Their ordinary  hair reminds you of your sister or best friend in college.  Everyone made fun of Judge Jeanine Pirro’s flyaway hair one night on Fox News.  But  I thought it made her appear softer, and down to earth.

Savannah looks more relatable now that she's doing her own hair. Do you like Savannah's hair?
She’s doing it herself now, during the covid-19 pandemic. Do you like Savannah’s hair?

Some people are upset about Savannah Guthrie’s hairstyle.  One woman tweeted that she ought to be ashamed of herself for not getting her hair done.  So, she’s supposed to let some infectious  hair dresser breathe on her, just so she can have stiff,  beauty parlor  hair?  I don’t think so.  Truth be told, I think she seems more genuine  without the perfect hair, clothes and makeup.  Do you like Savannah Guthrie’s and Jeanine Pirro’s  hair?  I do.

6 MISSING NUMBERS ABOUT COVID-19

 We’re bombarded with news about the coronavirus.  We know how many people got sick or died in our city, state, country, and all over the world.  Yesterday, we learned that the United States Treasury sent over one million stimulus checks to dead people.  But in spite of all the information flying around the media, there are still some things we don’t  know. There are six missing numbers about covid-19.

1. How many rich people received stimulus checks that they did not need? Shouldn’t  the  poor  and homeless have  received most of the stimulus money?

2. How many employees took a free vacation rather than returning to work? $600 a week federal unemployment plus state unemployment pay amounted to more than some were making in salary and tips. Especially in places with a low cost of living.

3.    How many patients were infected  in each nursing home ?   Our governor thinks it’s no one’s business.  But he’s wrong.  Most neighboring states are providing those statistics.

Missing covid-19 numbers. How many athletes have tested positive
6 missing covid-19 numbers. Many athletes testing positive are asymptomatic. What about everyone else?

4. How many  asymptomatic people are walking around? . Athletes all over the world are now being tested.  In one case,  there was a 35% infection rate among soccer players.   We’ll never really know those numbers unless every person in the world is tested.

   5. How many people who didn’t wear masks got sick? If you look at the folks  not wearing masks, you may notice that they often  don’t look very clean.    Out in the parking lot, you see them getting into dirty cars  filled with trash. Consequently, you wonder how their homes look.   These are not people worried about good hygiene.  It would be helpful to know the statistics.  Do those of us  who follow CDC guidelines have a lower infection rate?  Or does it not make any difference at all?  Careless people might have developed better immunity  over the years, after being exposed to so many  more germs.

6. How many businesses got rich on the virus? Manufacturers of hand sanitizer and face masks, for starters.  Grocery stores sales increased by 50% at first. .At least 7 healthcare  billionaires got  richer off the pandemic. As a result, while poor people are lined up for free food, these  lucky guys are looking at bigger yachts and vacation homes.

When we come up with  a vaccine, the pandemic will end.  Then, maybe some investigative reporters will come up with the answers to those questions.

COMIC RELIEF WITH MEGHAN & HARRY

I got a good laugh when I looked at my iphone this morning. It says Meghan moved to LA so she could run for president. Don’t you just love Harry and Meghan? They are the quintessential soap opera stars. They make us forget about covid-19 and police brutality. Just when we think we can’t stand the world we’re living in , we find comic relief with Harry & Meghan.

Meghan and Harry provide comic relief during these trying times.
Comic relief with Meghan & Harry. Their trials & tribulations keep us entertained during these trying times.

They’re full of drama and excitement.  Beautiful Meghan from a dysfunctional, mixed race family.Handsome Harry, from an equally dysfunctional family. Not mixed race, but mixed up, for sure.  And yet, they’re providing us with a glimpse of their struggles that are somehow entertaining and funny. As a result, those two have done the world a great favor the past three months. While we’ve been stuck at home during the coronavirus outbreak, they’ve taken our minds off of Donald Trump, Nancy Pelosi, Joe Biden, covid-19, and the violent protesters who are hell bent on destroying our country.

Just like us, Meghan and Harry had the rug pulled out from under. When they left England, they thought it would be smooth sailing. Instead, they’re on this bewildering odyssey in search of their true selves. Lurching from country to country, trying to figure out how to function and thrive.  And we have been with them every step of the way.  Are they broke? Is Meghan desperately trying to revive her acting career?  Is Prince Charles mad at them? Has the queen disowned them? It’s like this wonderful soap opera going on every day, and yet it’s real.

While standing in line at the supermarket checkout–sweating with my mask, feet aching– I look for distraction.  Pictures of Harry and Meghan on every magazine cover take my mind off the discomfort of social distancing. Viva Harry and Meghan!

I guess they’re wondering about their next move. Here’s my advice. Ditch stuffy old England. Forget about finding causes or new jobs. A reality show would draw millions of viewers.

NEWSPAPERS WOULD DIE WITHOUT OBITS

Who  would have two morning newspapers delivered to their home?  My husband and me, that’s who.  We’re old fashioned people who grew up in the days when they were a major source of news about current events. Now,  there’s little in the papers that we haven’t seen on the internet or TV.    Consequently, obituaries are  the only unique stories newspaper have to offer. Newspapers would die without obits.

With newspapers pages dwindling, there’s less “hard news” .    Readers look for juicy scandals and crime and major events.  They’re interested in local politics that affect their lives.   We don’t get much hard news lately.  There aren’t enough reporters on staff.  Therefore, we  get more” soft news”.  Long stories about sick children with rare diseases,  or protest marches.   Columns of print about frogs or daffodils or the changing of the season. Recipes make good fillers, too.  The ones that make it to print are full of weird ingredients and time consuming procedures.  I used to try some of those recipes.  As a result, my cupboards got overloaded with strange spices that I never used.

The only unique thing about newspapers are the obituaries.  They’ve undergone some radical changes in the past decade.  Time was when obits were fairly cut and dried.  Year of birth. Marriages. Children. Education. Clubs .  Survivors.  Profession.   Charities .  Date and time of funeral.  Long obituaries were discouraged for the average, middle class person.

Obituaries are the most interesting things to read. Newspapers would die without obituaries.
Obituaries have become much more interesting. Newspapers would die without obituaries.

Obituaries have become  like mini  biographies  We learn the deceased was the youngest or oldest of 10 children. What schools they attended from kindergarten on up.  Scholastic achievements and honors.  Whether they  were football players or cheerleaders or valedictorians .  Often married “the love of their life..” Became a fabulous mother/father,  grandparent, host and friend.  Enjoyed  pastimes like  bowling, painting, golfing,  bridge. Had hobbies like quilting or woodworking.  Every award they ever received in their entire life.  Each job they  held,. Countries visited, Volunteer work .  A lot of creative writing goes into  a decent obituatry.

I love reading obituaries,  especially if the deceased was  very old.   Of course, we never read about their failures and disappointments.  Consequently, the fantasy of a perfect life is carefully preserved for posterity.  Doesn’t everybody love a happy ending?

Newspapers would die without the obituaries.

BEST GIFT FOR AGING DAD

Forget the shirts and chocolates this Father’s  Day.  If your Dad  is aging  in place, there’s something much better you can give him .   Stop by his home and look around. Is there a flower bed that needs weeding? A broken screen door? A room that could use a coat of paint? If you’re able  to tackle one of those small jobs, that is the best gift for your aging Dad.

A home visit, some home repairs, is the best Father's Day Present.
Best gift for the aging Dad might be a visit from great grandchildren, or some help with home repairs.

In our modern culture, many of us no longer have grown children living nearby. But what a blessing for those who do.  My husband’s three kids are close enough to help out with  occasional chores and home repairs.  Recently, one son replaced our mailbox after it collapsed on the driveway.  Another fixed a fallen down light pole.  And his sweet daughter planted geraniums in our window box and outdoor planters.  Her husband pitched in, too.  Removing a picture window that hadn’t been washed from the inside for years, then putting it back more securely in place. And best of all, a visit from a great grandchild. Those are the most wonderful Fathers Day presents any man could ask for.

A few elderly widows live along our street.  As we sit on our front porch, we see their children drive in the driveway.  I don’t know whether they are bringing food, doing laundry, or just visiting.  But they are making a big difference in their mother’s lives. Because of their help and loving concern, their parent  can stay in her own home.

This may not have seemed as important before the coronavirus hit.  But now, those  folks who moved to retirement communities were confined to their rooms for months.  Seniors living in their own homes had much more freedom and less fear of catching covid-19.

If and when the time comes that we need help with the ordinary activities of daily life, we will opt for assisted living. We don’t expect our children to be our caregivers.  But for now, we feel blessed by their kindness. And just knowing they are there for us means a lot.

The best gift for your aging Dad might be replacing that flickering florescent light bulb  in the kitchen. There’s a special place in heaven for those who look out for their elderly parents.

Happy Father’s Day!