The dreaded income tax season has finally arrived.  Only a month left to get your act together, and figure how much you owe (or maybe get a refund).  Along about the end of January, we start receiving the various forms that we need to complete our tax statement for good old Uncle Sam..   You must report all of your income from various sources because if you don’t, it could trigger an audit.  When you get to be our age, the pile of papers is fairly thick because of separate pensions, social security, annuities, CD’s,  bank accounts, etc..  This year, our tax man found that we were missing a statement from one of our banks. That seemed like a fairly simple problem to solve.  Just call and ask for another print out. Right?  Wrong! We found that lazy bank service had hit a new low.

The trouble starts when you call the bank branch where you do your business.  You expect to speak with someone who is employed there, and probably knows you pretty well after all these years. But the person answering doesn’t know you, because she’s responding from a  remote call center in Indianapolis or some other distant city.  It takes her awhile to find your account, after suspiciously asking for your pin number, date of birth, SS number, legal name, address, phone numbers and maybe even the hospital where you were born.  Finally, she agrees to transfer the call to your local bank branch.

You breathe a sigh of relief.  You know the branch manager, assistant, and several of the clerks.  Surely Janice or Mary or Tom or whomever will find the information and print out another statement.  But the person who answers doesn’t remember you. She asks you to  repeat all of the above information.  For awhile, she draws a blank.  Doesn’t see your name. .  Finally, when you start to show some agitation, she manages to find your account, and the information your accountant needs.

You ask her nicely .”Could you just print out that form again, and e mail it to me?”

She responds, “ No, we can’t e mail confidential information. But we can get that form out to you in a couple of weeks..”

Trouble is, you’d like to get the tax return finished before you leave for vacation.

“Why the long wait?” You ask .” How hard is it to print out a form on a computer and slip it in the mail.?”

“It’s not that hard to print it out,” she replies in a sugary sweet voice. “But the mail only goes out once a week, and it just went out today.”

In my mind, I’m picturing the location of that  bank.  Directly across the street, in a large parking lot, is a bright blue  USPS post office box, where the mail is picked up six days a week.   I want to ask the lady why someone can’t get up off their  duff and drop the needed form in the box, which she can see from her desk.  But I know when I’m licked.  No one at this facility is going to budge from their comfy  work space to do a long time, supposedly valued customer, a simple  favor.

Lazy bank customer service has hit a new low.