Month: October 2019

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10 Elements Make Best Sellers Boring

My husband and I are avid readers.  Because he’s handicapped, it’s my job to pick out his library books.   His taste is different from mine.  I go for biographies and literary fiction while  he favors mysteries.   I’ve gotten pretty good at finding books he will like.  He enjoys best selling authors , while I avoid them like the plague.  If I see twenty books on the shelf by the same writer,  I know I  won’t like any of them.   Most people read only a few books a year, so that’s fine for them. But when you read a few books a week, your tastes become more refined.  The characters and plot of the average mystery are stereotypical.  90 % of best sellers are boring because of these 10 common, predictable elements.

Most best selling mysteries have stereotypical characters and plots
BEST SELLING MYSTERIES  OFTEN  HAVE STEREOTYPICAL PLOTS AND CHARACTERS

1. Protagonist has lost a parent, spouse or sibling. Female is strong and beautiful. Male is handsome, tough and may have military background.

2. One character owns an animal–usually a dog or a horse.

3. Set in large coastal city like  New York, California, or a resort area like Nantucket Island.  Also, ranches are popular.

4. Several explicit, gratuitous sex scenes. The formula used to be one or two but that’s increased, probably due to Netflix streaming series. Take any novel; ; eliminate these scenes, and see how well the novel sells.  In fact, best selling books today are thinly veiled porn.  Tolstoy probably wouldn’t make it.

5.  One good cop, detective, lawyer or judge

6. One bad guy.

7. Blood and guts.  Excruciating pain.   As an example, character is bound, gagged and tortured.

8. Perpetrator introduced in first chapter is usually false friend or spouse.

9. Story starts out fairly believable but soon develops numerous implausible twists and turns. (This is where I skip to the  back of the book.)

10. Someone  has a serious medical condition.  If they don’t die, they come close to it.

As the saying goes, ” if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.”  When it comes to most best sellers, I’ve been there done that.

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WHAT SHOULD A BIRTHDAY CARD COST?

If you are anyway near my age, you will remember when ordinary people sent greeting cards for every occasion.  In the post Depression years of hand-me-down-clothes and bean dinners, my parents still managed to pay for printed Christmas  cards.  I’m pretty sure they addressed and stamped about 50 every year.  And received just as many in return. I can’t remember what they cost, but certainly not the going price of  greeting cards today, in the range of $5 or $6.  What should a birthday card cost?

Greeting cards are way too expensive
GREETING CARDS HAVE GOTTEN SO EXPENSIVE THAT THEY’RE MORE LIKE A GIFT

Grocery stores and pharmacies have racks full of expensive cards.   Most recipients  glance at a  card, quickly scan the message, then turn it over to see how much the card cost.  If someone paid a lot ,  we’re flattered. The sender thinks that much of us.  We go back and reread the message.   We may stand our card up on a desk or coffee table for a day or two because it seems a waste to discard it right away.  Some people save all of their cards, but most don’t.

The cost of big name greeting cards  has escalated so  rapidly that you wonder why anyone buys them.  The Dollar Stores began selling cards a while back. At first,  they looked like they’d been run off on  a copy machine.   But lately, the quality of those cards has improved vastly.   They’re no longer so impersonal.  They have his and her cards for every type of relative imaginable. And the truth is, my children and  grandchildren are more interested in the size of the enclosed check than the cost of the card. .

Recently, rather than pay $6 for a printed greeting, I decided to write a personal note on a modestly priced card.  Doesn’t it mean more to think a person sat down, picked up a pen, and took the time to send us a few special thoughts?

A few years back, I heard an old friend had suffered a stroke.  Instead of  rushing to the store for a get well  card, I found a small note card in my drawer and took the time to write her a personal letter, encouraging her to stay strong, and to let her know I was thinking about her.  When I saw  her a few months later, she thanked me profusely. Clearly, that note  meant more to her than an expensive, printed card.

Younger people don’t spend the time and money to send greeting cards.   They text or email or send a Facebook message.  But I still think it means a lot to get a handwritten greeting in the mail.

What should a birthday card cost?  It really doesn’t matter.  It’s the thought that counts.

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THANK YOU, DANCING WITH THE STARS

Each morning upon awakening,  I pick up my i phone  The first thing I see. before unlocking the phone, are messages  about all the unpleasant things going on in the world. My stomach is churning with anxiety even before getting out of bed.  It continues all day and up until bedtime. Is it any wonder I have occasional nightmares? But last night’s television program  offered a respite from all the bad news.  Thank you, Dancing With The Stars, for a good night’s  sleep, and sweet dreams.

Dancing With the Stars is America at it's best
MANY CONTESTANTS ON DANCING WITH THE STARS ARE WAY OUT OF THEIR COMFORT ZONE.

What I love about Danicng With The Stars  is its lack of perfection.  Some of the contestants are awkward and out of shape.  Many are way out of their comfort zone.  But they’re gamely trying their best not to make a fool of themselves.  Isn’t that where most of us have been at one time or another in our lives?

Dancing With The Stars has come a long way since it’s first season.  Then, it was mostly about the dancing. The sets and costumes weren’t so spectacular. Later, they went through a time when  the women were half naked in their revealing costumes.  My husband liked that, but I thought it not so good for younger kids who might be watching. Now, they’ve gone all out with gorgeous,  glittering costumes and glamorous sets.  It’s like watching a Broadway show.

Best of all, for two hours, you don’t have to see television shows and news reports  about murder, sex, gender issues, racism, politics.  Better yet, you don’t have to hear about:  impeachment, Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan, Trump, Schiff, Pelosi, Isis, Turkey, or any of the other cringe worthy words or topics that make you grit your teeth and wish it would go away.

This show represents  America at its best. It takes our mind off our worries and gives us two hours of dazzling  entertainment.  Thank you, Dancing With The Stars.

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DO YOU TAKE WHIMS OR STICK TO IT?

Most of us know people who take whims.  We might even act on a few ourselves.  What’s wrong with that?   We may decide we don’t like our job,  our spouse, or the place where we live–and walk out.   We may take up tennis or gardening for awhile , then quit.  What kind of person are you?  Do you take whims or stick to it?

The practice of tai chi has many benefits for those who stick with it.

For the past 15 years, I’ve attended a class in tai chi at least twice a week.  Tai chi has helped me  walk again after a bad fall,and  several  bouts of sciatica and arthritis.   Its meditation techniques have gotten me through  personal sorrows.  With all the obvious benefits tai chi has to offer, I’m saddened by the fact that so many people take it up on a whim, then leave after a few months.

Why would a person give up on a simple practice that has so many psychological and physical benefits?. Tai chi is cheap and easy.  But it does require plain old stick-to-itiveness to reap the benefits.  Maybe you started for the wrong reasons.  To lose weight?  Actually, it’s not a vigorous exercise, and it won’t work off those extra calories you consume  every day.  However, if you stay with it long enough, it may calm you down, and reduce “stress eating.”

There’s an old saying, “Losers quit when they’re tired; winners quit when they’ve won.”  The quote is about determination, and the willingness to persevere.  If someone drops out of an activity  because it’s tiring, and they haven’t gotten the desired results  soon enough,  they’ve lost the time and effort they invested, and wasted an opportunity to succeed.

Do you ever look back on your childhood,  and wish you’d stuck with those music lessons?  If you had, you might have become a country music star or a concert pianist. Did you take some bridge lessons once, then quit because you weren’t winning right away? If you had stuck with it, you could have an enjoyable  pastime even if you live to be 90.

What should you do when you get tired of something you’ve started? That’s when your determination kicks in.  Keep going.  Winner’s quit when they’ve won!

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9 REASONS TO TAKE THE NEWSPAPER

I know what it’s like to go without a newspaper.  For over 20 years, we  went South in the winter to islands where we couldn’t buy a metropolitan newspaper.  Yes, we had the internet, and could access the stories in our local paper at home.  But it wasn’t the same at all.  Each morning, when we had our coffee, we tried to pretend it didn’t matter.  We turned on the Today Show, and surfed the net.  But there was a great big void at the beginning of our day.  Here are 9 reasons to take the newspaper.

Reading a newspaper in print is more leisurely that online
THE BEST WAY TO START THE DAY IS WITH A PRINT EDITION OF YOUR FAVORITE NEWSPAPER.

1. They’re easier on the eyes.  Black and white newsprint on paper has no damaging  UV light from a computer or cellphone

2.  It’s more relaxing to lean back in your recliner and flip through the pages vs. sitting at a computer or holding an i phone.

3.. You’re better informed.  Reading a news story of three or four columns gives you an in depth view of what’s really going on with this particular situation.  Yes, you could read it all on your computer, but you probably will read only two  or three  paragraphs before shifting to the next headline.

     4.  The funnies.   There are three or four comic strips I  really like.  But if I have plenty of time and nothing much to do, I’m  apt to find a few others.

5.  The advice columns.  I find these columnists immensely amusing.  Why do people ask advice when the answer is so obvious?f.  It’s fun to mentally put in your own two cents.  And sometimes, you can clip a column that hits home and send it on to a relative or friend.

       6.   Sharing. My husband and I discuss the different news stories, and  pass them back and forth to point out what one of us may have missed.

7. The Bridge column and the puzzles.  These   games are a fun way to challenge your brain.

         8.  Advertisements.  Unlike television, you can pick and choose the ones that interest you.  Yes, you can go online to find the supermarket ads.  But it’s much pleasanter to go through them in the newspaper.  And then, on Sundays, there are the coupons!  And, if you’re interested, you can peruse  the real estate ads and check out home values in your area.

9. More bang for your buck. You can read a $5 issue of People Magazine in 5 minutes.  But you can easily find an hour’s worth of reading material in a dollar newspaper.

Believe it or not, we take two newspapers at our house, which  gives us a different perspective.  Besides, it’s nice to see what’s going on in Indianapolis  where my daughter lives with her family. Many local newspapers are going out of business.  But we hope ours doesn’t.

Viva La Newspapers!

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FIND AN OASIS OF CIVILITY HERE

Do you miss the old days when young people were well mannered?   Look no further than a nearby private college campus.  My city  boasts of several colleges, including a state university.    But  two   campuses nearby—an engineering college (#1 in the nation) and a small Catholic college– are bastions of the three R’s: Respect, Responsibility, Resourcefulness.  Here, you will find an oasis of civility.

Although  they are private schools, many of the students are  not rich.  Most receive some type of financial  aid.  But there’s something different going on .   Students  of every color, race, religion and nationality  interact harmoniously, without rancor or prejudice.   
Private college campuses are an oasis of civility, with serious students
If you’re looking for an oasis of civility, stroll around a private college campus.

How do these students stand out?   First of all, they’re not loud.  When you cross their path, they smile  and nod..  They open doors  and respect  older people. The girls don’t wear shorts that look like underpants.  The guys aren’t covered with tattoos.  If you overhear them talking in public, their vocabulary is not filled  with vulgarity and four letter words.  No one gives you the finger. You never see them smoking.

If you go for Sunday brunch at the local college hangout, you can easily  identify students from these two colleges.    They carry on conversations in a normal tone of voice .  Together,  in one booth,  you’ll see kids of different  color and nationality  talking seriously.  They don’t jump the line or bump into other customers.  Although I’m sure they are  amorous as the students from other colleges, they don’t make a public show of affection.

Private College Students are more focused on learning
Private college students form a more tightly knit community, focused on learning.

Why the difference between public and private school students?  Perhaps it’s because private schools are more focused on learning, and have more closely knit communities.

If you  feel  like American  society  is falling apart,  drive out to one of these colleges and take a walk around the campus. Here, you will find  an oasis of civility.    If these young people  are destined to be  leaders of the next generation,  our country is safe for our  grandchildren.